Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Ramblings On Hate, Love, Justice, and Kony.

I apologize for not writing anything over the past week or so. Part of it was that I was focused on winding down, discovering what my new life will be like without professional blogging, and trying to regroup a bit. The other part of it, though, was that there is just one all-consuming issue burdening my heart and mind as of late...

I knew I would bring myself to write at least something on this topic sooner or later. After all, it falls under at least 5 of the categories on my "About Me" blurb to the right: Jesus, social justice, Africa, peace, love...

That's right. I'm talkin' Kony 2012.

I kept putting it off. I finally decided I would not write about it. Until today. When I saw this article tonight. I'll be honest. I cried. No, I wept. And now I am compelled to write.

A compassionate man has a BIG heart for a serious issue. He helps ignite an amazing charity organization centralized around bringing awareness to this issue. Doing something about this issue. Breaking people's hearts over this issue. Helping those around the world love the Invisible Children.

He creates a video with good intentions. Intentions to bring more awareness to the American people about this horrible Kony character. He pours his heart, soul, and life into this mission of his. Finally, in 2012, the video is released out into the Web. It unexpectedly goes viral.

Next thing I know? I'm seeing Invisible Children and Kony plastered all over Twitter and Facebook. I was SHOCKED. I have been following Invisible Children's work for years. LRA and Kony are subjects that nobody ever speaks of, and people think you're crazy when you start talking about it. Needless to say, I was a little bit taken aback when I signed on to Facebook and saw riots ensuing over this Kony 2012 video. My first thought was, "People know who Kony is now?" Furthermore, "People CARE about this issue now?"

I was excited...that is until everybody began throwing rocks. BIG. GIANT. ROCKS.

I just sat back and took it all in. My heart was breaking over all of it. I can't imagine what video director Jason Russell was going through. Oh wait - now I can. He was so overburdened by the stress of it all that he suffered psychosis and is now hospitalized.

What is this earth that we live on? Who have we become? A defender of social justice tries to bring awareness to people and he is hospitalized as a result of all the HATE?

I get the criticism. (If you're in the dark on all of this, read this great article that compiles all of the controversy from both sides of the debate.) I really do. I understand where some of the controversy come from. If I'm being completely honest, there's a whole lot that I don't understand at all, too. Social justice issues are always deep, dirty, complicated, ugly, and twisted. It's tough to get to the root of the problem, and even more difficult to come to a solution.

Like I said, I get the criticism. A wave of shallow enthusiasm has passed over the American people. It will soon be gone, as it always is. People are jumping on the Kony bandwagon, and they will soon jump off if they haven't already.

But my heart begs the question, "So what? At least there's awareness now. At least people know about it." Even if it's half-truths, some of the facts are very wrong, or it's only shallow-deep. People know the problem exists now. That's at least a quarter of the battle. I'd say we're at least one step closer than we were before nobody even knew who Kony was, wouldn't you?

I understand the critiques. I don't understand the hate. I never will. I read some really horrendous comments about Jason Russell and the Invisible Children organization. Comments from people who obviously don't know the history of Invisible Children's work over the past 5+ years. How could anybody question their motives and say such despicable things about this organization?

Better yet, how can there be so much hate that a well-meaning man full of love for people around the world goes out of his mind and ends up in the hospital?

Have you ever been so overwhelmed by an issue that your heart just feels like it may burst? Or your mind may explode? I'm guessing this is how Jason Russell felt these last few weeks as hate poured on criticism poured on top of more hate was thrown viciously at him.

I remember back in the early days of my blogging when I wrote a post on the horrors of Tanzania poverty. I recounted stories from an acquaintance who had recently visited the slums of Tanzania. My heart ached as I pounded out these tragic stories onto the keyboard. I knew that everybody would feel the same as I did - that we must help in any way we can. I was trying to raise money for the cause. I did not receive a single positive comment on the post. Instead, I received an excruciatingly long e-mail from a critic who had been to other areas of Tanzania that were not like this. She said some pretty horrible things to me, and I lay in bed all day crying over the fact that she could be so heartless and that nobody cared one bit about people on the other side of the world. I felt defeated.

If one comment affected me that much, I understand how this Jason Russell character crumbled under criticism, exhaustion, and feelings of defeat and hopelessness. I'm sure his internal crumble came on for a variety of reasons, including the fact that he realized people just don't care about this issue the way he hoped they would. We're too wrapped up in facts, politics, philosophical debates, and exact sciences.

We don't know how to simply look at an issue as a whole and say, "That is wrong. Love must overcome. Social justice will win this battle. We can make it happen. Let's band together and do something about it."

Who cares if Kony is no longer in the same region that the video says he is? The bottom line is that he's out there somewhere doing horrible, unmentionable things to innocent children who deserve love, care, warmth, and a better world.

I like what Jen Hatmaker said in her perfectly-written response to this issue (if you haven't read this, please DO).

"What if it is just this: We care so much about their suffering. We ache for the seven-year-olds who were forced to kill their parents. We grieve the loss of innocence and life. We yearn for justice and stability for the people of Uganda. In the scope of humanity, we consider Ugandans our brothers and sisters."


Amen.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Making A Difference

Some days I wake up, go about my normal mundane routine, and then go to bed. As my head hits the pillow and a tear escapes the corner of my eye, I silently breathe with every fiber of my being, "Lord, am I making a difference at all in this life?"

That's all I want for this life. To be LOVE to everybody I come in contact with. To make somebody's day brighter. To turn frowns into smiles and sadness into joy. To change another human being's life in some very tiny way.

Tonight I realized that I have had the privilege of being used by a Mighty God in a mighty way. As I sent my "goodbye post" out into the blogosphere to go live, e-mails and comments began pouring in of how my website changed people's lives.

I cried. Then cried. And then cried some more.

And thanked God for using little ole me in such a big way, even if I had a difficult time seeing it while in the midst of it all.

I still know I made the right decision. But it's really. really. really. nice to know that I DID make a difference in people's lives.

And if you find yourself wondering the same thing some days...I can promise you that you are most likely making a difference in somebody's life, whether you realize it or not.

Be encouraged, sweet one. Jesus chooses to use the lowly and the unnoticeable. That's YOU. So go in love...

Friday, March 9, 2012

I Find Freedom Tonight...

Tonight I find myself standing in the kitchen, about to make my very favorite brussel sprouts recipe with my amazingly tasty brussel sprouts from The Veggie Bin.

I find freedom in taking my time - in knowing that I don't have to meticulously place my dinner on a white plate and take a zillion snapshots until I get the perfect one...just in case I want to use it on my blog.

Life is slower now - even just in three short days since I decided to walk away from professional blogging.

Life is nicer now.

I can relax. I have my evenings back. I can enjoy living again.

I love that I am inspired to write suddenly, and I WANT to write. I hop on here, write a short blurb, and that is all.

Now on to my brussel sprouts...

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

It's Time.

I've been a professional blogger for almost 3 years.  It was a grand journey, but just tonight I finally made the very difficult decision to walk away.

I made this decision for so many different reasons, and I contemplated this choice for well over a year. As I cry tears of sadness and joy, I must say I have an extreme sense of peace about the whole thing.

And it's time.

Time to WRITE again.
Time to love life.
Time to love writing.
Time to have more time.
Time to be free.
Time to let go of fear.
Time to stop feeling like an utter failure.
Time to express myself.
Time to talk love.
Time to talk joy.
Time to talk passion.
Time to be ME.

And the beauty of it all is that I could care less if zero people are reading this or if a billion are reading this. Oh the freedom that not frantically tracking stats on Google Analytics brings!

That's how I know this is the right choice.

Welcome to my blog. All you'll find here is me. Just Me. Meg.